The Beginning
I’ll preface this by saying that all my life I’ve gone to church. My parents are believers, so we often went to church as a family and I enjoyed going to Sunday school and learning about God. However, like many others who grew up in church, I did not live the life of a true, born again, believer. While I still prayed, believed in God, and even experienced multiple answered prayers, I lived a life of sin until the day I truly met Jesus at the age of 19. Before then, however, I dabbled in various new age practices that nearly ruined my life.
I was always a very curious child, and oftentimes this curiosity landed me into various kinds of trouble. I was particularly curious about the things of the spirit and had a longing to understand deep spiritual matters, as many of us do. When I was about 17, I began to read and check my horoscope regularly, frequently visiting websites that offered detailed “readings” about my birth chart, star sign and other matters of astrology. Having had a Christian background, I knew that the Bible was explicitly against consulting mediums, fortune tellers, spiritists, practioners of divination, necromancers, and worshiping stars, but I never really understood what was so wrong about any of these things – only that God had prohibited such practices (see Deuteronomy 18:10-14). I was incredibly ignorant at the time and had no idea what I was getting myself into. Nevertheless, the devil took full advantage of that ignorance as he gained more and more access into my life through my sin and disobedience to God. As accurately stated in Hosea 4:6, “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge”.
Towards the end of high school, my curiosity grew and I began to read more and more about various spiritual and new age practices. One of these was astral projection, in which I tried multiple times to leave my physical body after having read stories about people who had done so with the help of their “spirit guides” (which I now know to be demons masquerading as angels [see 2 Corinthians 11:14]). Moreover, I began to consult online mediums and tarot card readers on a daily basis in order to seek clarity and guidance about a frustrating relationship that I was in at the time. Had I truly understood the gravity of my actions, or the fact that I was opening demonic doors through dabbling in these practices, I would never have ventured anywhere near Pandora’s box. In fact, I would have ran far away and clung to God much sooner than I did. But, I still thank God for His mercy and grace in opening my eyes when He did.
The Longing for Knowledge
Not only did curiosity push me towards these abominable practices, but so did frustration and an insatiable hunger to know things. I always wanted to know and have knowledge about all sorts of things, and I fear that this is how many others are hooked into new age practices. In fact, when we travel back to the beginning in the book of Genesis, the serpent convinced Eve to sin against God by eating the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, by telling her that as soon as she did, her eyes would be opened and she would “be like God, knowing good and evil.”(Genesis 3:5). As human beings, we all have an innate desire and longing to know God and to know the truth, but due to our lack of understanding we often seek to satiate this desire by pursuing what seems like enlightenment but, in reality, is only deep darkness and deception. As stated in 2 Corinthians 11:14, “And no wonder, for even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light.” Yet, despite all my failings and sins, God never stopped chasing after me. It is only by His grace that I was finally able to understand the truth that is in Jesus Christ, and it is only by His mercy that He intervened when He did. Moreover, I believe that if you’re reading this testimony, it is not by coincidence. He may be chasing after you too.
The Deception Revealed
Fast forward to when I left for university in 2019; I then began to practice the law of attraction and manifestation techniques. I became interested after stumbling upon popular new age “gurus” on YouTube. I then began following a man who would instruct his subscribers to write about the things that we wanted to manifest in our diaries, and then thank the universe, or even God, for having received them in advance. Seeing as I was ignorant and darkened in my understanding, this seemed somewhat innocent to me.
However, during this time I began to sense a gnawing in the back of my mind, and sometimes, I briefly questioned whether what I was doing was right. Believe it or not, during this entire period, I never stopped praying to God because I knew that He was real. I had never stopped praying from the time that I was a little girl. My problem was never that I didn’t believe in Him – I had always believed in Him, and I had watched Him do great things in my life. My problem was that I was not only ignorant about the extent of my sin, but also that I did not want to give up my sinful lifestyle. I had not wanted to fully surrender my life to Christ because I wanted to “enjoy” my youth, thinking that being born again would be boring and unfulfilling – a lie which was truly from the pit of hell, and designed to stop me from experiencing the fullness of life, joy and peace that I now do in Jesus Christ. Nevertheless, despite the negative feeling in the pit of my stomach, I continued to practice new age and law of attraction for months, and even experienced results. One day, however, things changed.
On one particular day, the mentor that I had been diligently following had posted a new video online, and in this video, he was asserting that we were all God. I listened confused and flabbergasted, as he even misused Bible scripture to try to prove the fact that we, as human beings, were God and could thus manipulate situations and people while creating our own world. What had begun as something somewhat innocent (writing in a journal and trying to manifest things and desires) was actually meant to lead to the conclusion or understanding that we were God or could be like Him. Just as Satan had convinced Eve in the beginning that she would “be like God” once she acquired forbidden knowledge by disobeying God’s command, so was this “guru” trying to convince us. It was the same old satanic lie, repackaged in a new way – that through “enlightenment”, knowledge, and manifestation, we would eventually become God or reach “God consciousness”. It was all about realizing that we were supposedly God and could, therefore, manipulate and gain anything we wanted through the power of manifestation. This is what most, if not all, new age practices eventually lead to -- the false and deceptive understanding that you are God.
At that moment, it was as if the light of truth and realization had broken forth, and I understood just how deeply in error I was. My Christian background would not allow me, even for a second, to believe the lie that I, or anyone else, was God. There was only one true living God, and we most certainly were not and could never be Him. Even in my ignorance I knew that much to be certain. I then began to frantically google and research “law of attraction vs Jesus”, and came across multiple testimonies on YouTube from those who had been saved by Christ, after having practiced new age and law of attraction. As I listened to their testimonies, I realized that they were incredibly similar to mine, and I could not believe just how much I had been deceived. One testimony that stuck out to me in particular, was by former new age teacher Steven Bancarz. It is easily accessible on YouTube, and I strongly recommend it to anyone seeking the truth in this matter.
Slowly, as God began to unravel the deep deception and reveal the truth to me, I became very grieved at the extent of my sin. The light had dawned, and I finally repented and cried out to God that day. I could hardly sleep that night, and the very next day I decided to give my life to Christ, and I became a born-again believer in my dorm room. I should also mention that during this time, my mother had also been worried about me and she had been praying that God would do His will in my life. I thank God for her. However, this was not the end of the journey.
Demonic Attacks and Covenants
Despite the fact that I had given my life to Christ, I still suffered heavy spiritual warfare and demonic attack. Whereas before, the demons that I had allowed into my life lay dormant, now that I had chosen to follow Christ, the devil’s retaliation came full force. For months, I would suffer from nightmares and frequent sleep paralysis, during which I would witness demonic figures walking around in my room and even crawling into my bed. The only thing that would chase them away was desperately calling and repeating the name of Jesus in my mind, at which point I would either wake up or the demons would flee. I don’t mention these things to scare anyone, but to shed light on the very real consequences of new age practices. Even though I had given my life to Christ, I was not absolved from the consequences of my actions. Although God may forgive our sins, that does not automatically mean that we can get away scot-free. Take the Biblical account of King David and Bathsheba, for example. In 2 Samuel chapter 12, the prophet Nathan explicitly tells King David that although God had forgiven him for sleeping with Bathsheba and having her husband killed, he and his family would still face severe judgement and consequences for his actions.
Similarly, these new age practices are sinful and abominable to God, who explicitly prohibits seeking powers or spiritual understanding outside of Him. This is for our own good. In doing these things, you are ignorantly opening doors in the spiritual realm and giving Satan and his demons the legal right to torment you and cause havoc in your life. During this time, I would cry out to God, confused, scared, and frustrated. I did not understand why I was being attacked in this way, and I would plead for His protection because I was too afraid to sleep at night. I then began to pray, fast and seek God for a solution. Eventually, I learned that I not only needed to repent of every single new age practice that I had dabbled in, but that I also needed to renounce everything that I had put my hand upon – from horoscopes, to tarot card readings, to watching mediums and psychics, to attempting astral projection, to law of attraction and manifestation, and even to unknowingly practicing witchcraft (yes, witchcraft, because the law of attraction does indeed turn into witchcraft when it is used to manipulate or subdue somebody else’s will in your favor). I also needed to renounce every covenant (contract) I had knowingly and unknowingly made with the kingdom of darkness whilst practicing new age. It took me a while to repent of and renounce all of these sins, and I also had to ask God for mercy concerning the doors I had opened. I asked Him to seal all of the evil spiritual doors shut with the blood of Jesus Christ. The things that I practiced in ignorance had very real consequences on my life. I share these things to shed light, not to cause fear. We need to understand that Satan is already defeated and underneath Jesus’ feet:
“And He put all things under His feet, and gave Him to be head over all things to the church.”
“And I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and hers; he will crush your head, and you will strike his heel.”
Furthermore, God has made it so that everything and everyone in the universe must bow down to the name of Jesus Christ, so we need not fear:
“Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”
A Call to Repentance
I urge and plead with anyone who may be involved in these practices to repent of everything you may have participated in. Repent of everything you have done in disobedience to God and to His word, including sins not to do with new age. Even sins like sexual immorality can open up spiritual doorways that give the enemy legal rights to torment you. This is why God warns us not to practice or participate in these sins. When you disobey God, you give the devil a foothold. Renounce these practices and surrender fully to Jesus Christ. Allow Jesus Christ to give you a new life, to give you peace, to give you joy, to give you purpose and to give you eternal life. Although I was once a grave sinner, I can now confidently say that I am a dearly loved child of God. He has proven it to me time and time again, and I am astonished at His mercy and grace. Not only that, but we have victory over the enemy through Christ, by the grace of God. Moreover, the relationship I now have with God, my heavenly Father, through Christ, is nothing short of beautiful and fulfilling. Allow God to fulfill you and stop running towards things that only leave you feeling empty and violated. God is merciful and gracious, and He loves us so much and He sent His only son, specifically, for the sinners. I leave you with these scriptures:
“When Jesus heard this, he told them, “Healthy people don’t need a doctor—sick people do. I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners.” ”
“But whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”
“Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.””
“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”